Blah!

So I signed on to AIM today, which I hardly ever do. My ex was on there. My ex who cheated on me behind my back and denies it to this day. My ex who broke up with me on valentine's day right after I told him my grandfather was in the hospital dying. I wanted to tell him how disappointed I was with him, and how much his lies hurt me. I wanted to tell him how he had left me alone during a really hard time in my life, loosing my grandpa. I wanted to tell him I hated him for what he had done and that he had been a waste of my time. I wanted to tell him how he had scarred me and made it so hard to trust people. But I didn't.

But what did I do? I said hello. I was cordial. Asking niceties and being polite. Ugh!

What is wrong with me? Seriously, why am I so nice to people who have screwed me over so bad? Why can't I get the guts to tell people how I really feel? Grrr grrr grrrr!!!

Okay and now back to our regularly scheduled programming...